Questions to Ask Your Parent After Touring an Assisted Living Community

Senior man being embraced by adult daughter

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When your parent is navigating the transition from their home to an assisted living community, there’s no doubt that you can provide much-needed support. But after you’ve helped your parent select which communities to visit, accompanied them on their tour and made sure their questions were answered by staff, what else can you do to help? As it turns out, asking your parent questions can be an effective way to help them process their impressions of the tour and arrive at the decision that will make them happy.




Asking Small Questions

According to clinical psychologist Dr. Robert Maurer, questions are better at engaging the brain than commands or suggestions. In his book, “One Small Step Can Change Your Life,” Maurer writes, “A question wakes up your brain and delights it. Your brain loves to take in questions, even ludicrous or odd ones, and turn them over.” What’s more, questions can inject spaciousness into what might otherwise be a stressful decision-making process — a particular boon since your parent may have a range of emotions and anxieties about the upcoming change in their lives.



After Your Tour

Senior friends relaxing in their retirement community

Shortly after your tour, when your parent’s impressions are still fresh, take time to get their initial feelings about the assisted living community you just visited. Remember to give them plenty of space to answer without injecting your own opinions. Questions to ask include:

  • What was your favorite part of our tour?
  • Did you like the people we met?
  • Did you feel comfortable with the staff members who would be helping you?
  • Can you imagine being friends or spending time with the residents we met?
  • Which activities would you most look forward to?
  • Would you enjoy spending time in the common areas?
  • How would you decorate your apartment if you lived here?
  • What excites you about this community?
  • What reservations do you have about this community?
  • Was there anything you didn’t like?
  • Would you recommend this community to a friend?
  • Do you think your pet would like to live here?
  • Could you feel at home here?
  • How do you feel when you imagine saying yes to this community?
  • What would a typical day in this community look like for you?
  • Do the services and amenities fit with your lifestyle?
  • Could you continue your spiritual practice if you lived here?
  • What did you think of the food? Did it look, smell, taste good?
  • Would you like to dine here every day?

Follow-Up Questions

Senior woman getting tea from adult son

Give your parent a few days to sift through their impressions after the tour. Then check in to see if they’ve made a decision or if new questions or reactions have risen to the surface. If they’re still undecided, consider asking:

  • Is there something keeping you from making a decision about this community?
  • If you could set aside worry and fear for just 30 seconds, how would you feel about this community?
  • What’s one challenge you face right now that would no longer be a concern if you lived in this community?
  • Is there something you worry you’ll have to give up to live in this community?
  • Do you have additional questions you’d like to ask about this community?
  • Would you like to tour the community again?
  • If you were to say yes to this community, would there be issues I could help you settle – financial planning, downsizing, for example – before you move?




Tour The Ridge

As you and your parent consider the options for assisted living, include The Ridge on your list of possibilities. Our assisted living communities in Holladay, UT, Salt Lake City, UT and Denver, CO offer support tailored to residents’ needs so they can make the most of our luxury atmosphere and take delight in the amenities and services we provide. Schedule a tour so you can experience all we have to offer, or contact us so we can answer any questions you might have.